Tag Archives: Support

Dealing with Change!

Good evening!

It has been a while since I last posted, so I thought I would spend some time this evening letting you know how things are going!

Since last we spoke, I have gotten on some much needed anti-anxiety/depression medication, and I must admit, for the first week or two, I was pleasantly pleased by how much better I felt. Not too long after starting these new medications I had some huge changes announced in my work life that neither myself nor my team had any control, input, or say over, and whether we liked it or not the changes were happening and they were going to happen in a very short amount of time. The changes have already started to take place, and to say that I am not dealing well is a HUGE understatement!

I have always prided myself on being an advocate for change, and I am always on the lookout for how to make things better, so I am not sure why I am struggling so badly now. I took a mental health day today – I was literally up all night stressing over what is going on at work – so I knew I needed to take some time to make my health a priority and get some much needed sleep. I really did have the best of intentions, but as soon as my sweetie left to go to work this morning, which was only about an hour after I had finally fallen to sleep, I was back up and just freaking about all of these changes at work that has just left me feeling so powerless and unimportant. I literally planted myself on my couch, with my two four-legged girls, and hung out under a blanket while giving my NetFlix account a workout!!

As soon as my sweetie found out that that is how I had been spending my day, and that my “meals” today consisted of some bread and peanuts, he scheduled an intervention, and told me to be dressed and ready to go out by 3, because “We are getting you out of the house!”

My sweetie, who is my Rock of Gibraltar, picked me up and took me downtown, on what he was calling a de-stressing date. He made sure that I took my new camera with us so that I can take pictures of anything that inspired me. He also declared himself my “sexy photographer’s assistant”, which is SOOOOOOO true! I am one lucky girl!! We had so much fun spending time just brainstorming what our next steps will be, even going through worse case scenarios, where he helped me see that even that wasn’t as bad as what I had made it out to be in my head. He convinced me that we really will make it through all of this, and we will do it together – see I told you I was a lucky girl!! I took a bunch of pics while my sweetie kept me laughing, and he even patiently stayed with me while I visited one of my favorite craft stores for a few new art supplies (as if I really needed any more) 🙂 Then he took me to one of our favorite restaurants where we were able to share a really delicious steak dinner, which was quite scrum-diddly-umptious, if I do say so myself!!!

We are now home, and I am seriously tired, and am wondering if 7:30 is too early to go to bed?? No worries! I am already in my pj’s, listening to some happy music and am ready to have a quiet evening truly relaxing at home! and even though I know that I am going to have to make some difficult decision over the next couple of months, tonight, at this moment, I am going to seriously be thankful for all that I do have. As my sister, Alex would remind me, “I am blessed. I am loved.” Yes, sissy, I am.

Here is to a much needed restful evening! 😉

Signature Line

If you want to have a different life, you have to live differently!!

Gratitude!

Good evening!

Jason and I had a long garage sale today, on a day that was much too hot to be standing in the sun all day, and with not much foot traffic. We are both very tired and ready to close the house down for the evening! So, I am going to try and keep this post nice and short.

First, I thought I would start with an update from yesterday’s post. I am happy to say that Jason and I are doing much better today. One of our friends said to me, “17 years is a lot of one-day-at-a-times”.

It was what I needed to hear.

Somehow Jason and I had forgotten that every relationship is about dealing with the one-day-at-a-times, and not clumping all of the would-a, should-a, could-a’s and lobbing them at each other.

With that reminder, the decision has been made. We are going to do our best and work it out. At the end of the day, the scale tips much heavier towards good days than bad, and we are going to chalk yesterday up to one of the not so pleasant days. I know that we will both be missing out on A LOT of happy tomorrows together, if either one of us give up now. So, for us, we decided that we weren’t going to let walking away from each other be an option – we have been through too much to let all of this go because, in a moment of exhaustion, we argued about something petty! (and in all honesty, I don’t even remember what started it!)

Before I leave you this evening, I wanted to say “thank you”. Truly. The outpouring of love, prayer, and support that Jason and I have received has been overwhelming. I am so thankful that we have the kind of support group that seems to just come from everywhere to stand by us, laugh with us, cry with us, pray with us, and simply love us. For all of the words of encouragement we have received from friends, and family within the last 24 hours, I am truly grateful! I truly hope that we can return the favor some day when you are needing a pick me up!!

Thank you!

Thank you!

Thank you!

Tonight, I can HONESTLY say…

Have a FABULOUS evening!! 😉

A Monday of Positivity!

From Tiffany's "Happy Girls are the Prettiest Girls" Shoot

Good evening!

Work did get a little bumpy today, but I knew that it would, right? And it did, of course! There are a lot of changes going to be happening in the next few months, but that is alright. I know that everything is going to turn out alright, it always has and always will.

I have to tell you that all of this tapping into my creativity has given me hope that there is light at the end of the tunnel for my life! I feel like I am learning what my true purpose for being placed on this earth for. I can not yet articulate what I am thinking, but I am learning that it is ok to be creative, and to use my creativity to somehow make the world a better place. I honestly didn’t think that was possible before. I thought creativity was something that you stole moments of while your life takes a break from chewing you up! Sad, really!! I realize that I don’t have to be “chewed up any longer” that I am allowed to take time for myself, without guilt, to replenish and recoup what is the best of me, so that I am ready and able to better take care of others!! That, my friend, is called growth!!! LOL! 😉

I had quite the surprise right before I left the office today! Sometime last week, I had taken a leap of faith and had e-mailed a couple of my FAVORITE photographers/bloggers, not really thinking that any of them would EVER write me back. It was more for the action of stepping outside of my box, and doing something I wouldn’t think I could do. Well, today, quite unexpectedly, I got a return e-mail!!!! When I saw the name of the person sending it, I can not tell you how excited I was to see her name – I literally started jumping up and down inside of my own head!! YEAH!!! WHOO!!! HOO!! I can’t believe she wrote back!!! Anyway, it was Tiffany Kirchner Dixon of The Fancy Farmgirl, and she very graciously answered all of my questions, plus gave me some very lovely encouraging words of advice for getting myself started with photography!!! To say that I was jazzed, was a HUGE UNDERSTATEMENT!! It gave me proof that I was on the right track. I am still not sure what my “art” is, or how it is going to manifest itself, but I KNOW that I am heading in the right direction!!!

Tiffany’s blog (I feel like we are at that place now, you know, first name basis!!) is ABSOLUTELY SCRUMTIOUS!! I love the ebb and flow of her postings, reading about her family, and perusing her DREAM-LIKE photography!! I KNOW that my sis, Alex would REALLY like her work too!! PERFECTION!! The photo above is one Tiffany’s and you can see more of her photography here!

I have to confess that even though that was the MOST PLEASANT SURPRISE to my day, I was soooo thankful to get home today! I had been hankering to get home the entire work day, kind of like a little kid pining for recess during an especially difficult math test!! My sweetie and I finally scheduled some time to have some quality time for right after work! It has been a while since we have both been able to get away from all of the work and distractions of life, and just spend some much needed time together! It is ALWAYS so much fun to spend time with him, sharing out laughter and dreams! He is just such a genuine human being, and he really had this way of bringing out the playful kid out of me!! He is my own personal gentle giant, and really makes my life so much better!! Thank you, Love! You mean the world to me!!!

Well, before I ramble on for the rest of the night, I am going to close up shop for the night so that I can go climb into bed with my love and do some reading before we slip off to la-la-land and have some SWEET DREAMS!!!

Have a FABULOUS evening!! 😉