In the American culture there is this subconscious message that you can not be happy if you are not constantly becoming more, doing more, giving more, socializing unceasingly, or accomplishing more. Unfortunately, this message is true even if it means the detriment of your health, level of happiness, quality of family-life, or self-sanity. We have gotten the message loud and clear that busyness equals success, noise and constant chatter the expectation, and that go-go-go is the absolute norm.
Being an American for the whole of my life, and having had bought into this notion as truth, I was surprised to discover that even though this belief might be the American mantra, it did not have to be my mantra any longer. In that moment, I made the realization that I was afraid to be alone, especially alone in silence. I was afraid to hear what my soul might have to say to me, and what of God? I had always had a relationship with God, and at one time I had prided myself on being able to hear His voice; that still small voice at the very deepest of myself. I was afraid of hearing that too. Would He be disappointed in me? Had I let Him down? Had I let myself down? I wasn’t sure – I was too busy being busy to take the time to find out, but I knew it was time.
Time to slow down.
Time to turn off all distractions.
Time to make boundaries.
Time to be alone.
Time to get quiet.
Time to focus.
Time to breathe.
Time to listen.
As soon as I turned it all of, I realized being quiet, alone, and still was very difficult for me. There was a lot of me that I had been neglecting for a long time, and I knew that it was now or never to get to the heart of the matter. As soon as the initial jittery-ness and awkwardness of hanging out with my inner self fell away, I realized there was a lot of ME that I had been missing. What I was feeling, what I longed for, what I was craving, what I was afraid of, what brought me happiness, all of that started rushing to me loud and clear.
In all honesty that was rather overwhelming at first, but always having been an avid reader, I had stumbled across a tool that turned out to be invaluable for my healing, and something that I have practiced faithfully to this day. That tool was Julia Cameron’s The Artist Way Morning Pages. I know I was not the first to discover this truly life changing practice, but I have found that God does not give you the needed resources until you are ready to receive them, and I was ready. Boy was I ready.
What Morning Pages are, is a practice of writing 3 pages of long-hand uninterrupted thoughts, in the still quiet moments of morning. Just you, your soul, and God. You don’t focus on content, spelling, grammar, or structure. The goal is to write, non-stop, and just let everything in you spill out onto the pages.
Julia Cameron puts it best:
“Morning Pages are three pages of longhand, stream of consciousness writing, done first thing in the morning. *There is no wrong way to do Morning Pages*– they are not high art. They are not even “writing.” They are about anything and everything that crosses your mind– and they are for your eyes only. Morning Pages provoke, clarify, comfort, cajole, prioritize and synchronize the day at hand. Do not over-think Morning Pages: just put three pages of anything on the page…and then do three more pages tomorrow.”
I get up at 5:30 every morning to make sure I have enough un-rushed, quiet moments in the morning to do these pages. Some days it is easier than others, and then there are days when my mind is a blank, and all I can write is “I am so tired, I can’t believe it is so early. I am just so tired.” but that doesn’t matter, it is just constant writing. These pages become sacred, and I have told my husband that no one is to read these pages. Ever. They are mine, and mine alone. Sacred.
When I need inspiration or help with a particular question, I find myself going back to my old pages (I am on my third Morning Pages journal), and I just read. Sometimes I read about a list of mundane to-do’s for the day, or there is a telling of a dream that I had had that night prior, that I have completely forgotten about by now, but then there are juicy tidbits that I sometimes wonder if I had actually written them. These are miraculous answers to questions that I had been struggling with, words of wisdom that seem to pop out at the most opportune times, or encouragement from a voice deep within that seem to come back to me at just the perfect moments.
These pages have become a sacred connection and window to what is going on inside of myself,both consciously and unconsciously. I find that I am more centered. Calmer. Able to look at my world with new eyes, and a new perception. It has helped focused me on what is truly important and who I really and most authentically am: A creative introvert, who truly loves people, and thrives best when I am either alone or with a small group of intimate friends!
I would challenge you to give this practice a try. Get up in the early hours of morning, with a pen, and a few pieces of paper, and just find a quiet corner to write 3 pages, long-hand, letting everything and anything spill out of you. Do this for about a week before you go back and re-read some of your thoughts.
I would LOVE it if you would take a moment to answer 3 questions regarding Morning Pages in the comment section of this post:
- What are your thoughts about Morning Pages?
- Is this a practice that you have taken up, or are planning on taking up?
- If you have taken up this practice, what has surprised you about your Morning Pages?
I can’t wait to hear your thoughts!
Here is to a FABULOUS evening!!
If you want to have a different life, you have to live differently!!