Monday, 2017-09-11

Good morning, beautiful creatives!

This is week #2 for me, of waking up at 4:30 AM. It is getting easier! I really am enjoying my time up, in the early morning, before anyone else is up and at em!

My mind is already racing though, thank you very much chronic anxiety – I will beat you one day!! But, today, I am just breathing in to it!

I always want to try and talk about something soft and fluffy, because that is usually the kinds of things that I am needing to hear, but today, the thing that keeps running through my mind is today’s data.

9/11

Now, for most Americans this is a date that will continue to haunt, well, at least it does me anyway!

Back on THE 9/11, my hubby and I were living in a different place, and I was just waking to get ready for work. We always awoke with the radio and for some reason, today’s show was different.

I wasn’t really getting out of bed yet, just laying there in that place that is halfway between awake and asleep. They were saying that a plane had gone into one of the Twin Towers in Manhattan, New York. They were talking like it was some kind of a horrific accident, the pilot must have been drunk or something.

Pretty quickly, the radio hosts got word that it was a terrorist attack in progress.

That got both of us out of bed pretty quickly.

I remember getting dressed, and calling my dad to tell him to turn on the news. I then proceeded to make a round of calls just making sure that all of my sisters were safe and aware, as we were on our way over to my sister-in-laws place to watch the news unfold together with family.

We arrived just in time to see plane #2 go into the Towers. It was terrifying, and surreal, and something that looked like it just came out of a Hollywood movie, but not a movie that I would ever want to see.

I remember that my family was the most important thing to me that day, but I also remember that as the day that my naive sense of safety went away, that somehow the bad things that I saw on the news really didn’t just happen to other people. That somehow I was immune to this badness.

I remember that leaving a really bad scar.

One that I still struggle with to this day.

Here we are, 16 years later, and although I no longer think about those horrible events, every-single-day, I do start feeling a bit “off” when this date comes around, and then when I actually do see the date of this day, I am reminded. And then I say a little prayer for all of those affected. The survivors, those that didn’t survive, the family members of all that were involved, and for all of those throughout our country, those who might feel like me, still-a-bit shell shocked by it all, and I hope that in some small way, I can somehow still help make the world a better place.

That is doable, right? I am not sure. I ask myself this all of the time, and I give myself no other choice, but to continue to have hope that it is doable!

Here is to remembering what is most important!